In his three years as the general manager of the dreadful Pittsburgh Pirates, Neal Huntington hasn’t shied away from shocking moves. First was in his inaugural season, shipping off Jason Bay. Then in his second year, sending Jack Wilson, Freddy Sanchez, Nate McClouth and Adam LaRoche packing for new cities, new teams and new dreams. Well Huntington has pulled the trigger once again, with what he calls his “Legend Package.”

During a one hour press conference on Fox Sports Pittsburgh, Huntington announced his new plan of action for the organization. Many had no idea what he was referring to and when the plan was revealed, it left the numerous members of the media in Pittsburgh stunned. In what Huntington called, “a deadline deal,” the last place Pirates acquired LW Wayne Gretzy, not sure where he is going to play but they have had similar problems with Lastings Milledge, P Roger Clemens, who will likely be sent to jail for a very long time in the next year and SG Michael Jordan, who in the mid 90s explored a baseball career in the Chicago White Sox organization.

“We feel Gretzky will give us needed depth and a bat to go to in the later innings. I heard he scored alot, runs I believe. He’s about as old as Andy LaRoche, and hey, they both suck so I figured might as well sign him.”

When asked about the Clemens acquisition, Huntington replied, “He can’t be much worse than Ross Olendorf, and he is a fighter, that’s what we need. Come on, the guy has denied steroid use for the past three years, he can handle adversity.” When BtBS attempted to contact Jordan on the situation, Michael had no valuable comment. “The Pirates. Me? No, can’t be possible. I gave up that sport awhile back.”

After a bombardment of criticism from the Pittsburgh media, Huntington stayed strong with his bold move.

“Look, playoff baseball hasn’t been played here since Pamela Anderson was a virgin.”

Huntington would add later, “It’s August 31st!!!!!! Trade Deadline, duh.”

When you’re 33 games out of first place and 44 games under .500 anything is possible. But for Pittsburgh, this is truly shocking. Usually they trade players, not sign them. With a month left in the season, it’ll be very interesting to see how the Bucos do down the stretch with the AARP squad out on the field at PNC Park. “When we win 35 straight games and steal the World Series, I’ll be the one laughing. Neal Huntington. Out” Can’t blame a guy for wanting to win, but Huntington’s plan for success is about as dismal as the Stimulus Package.

• In other National League news, the Cincinnati Reds extended their lead over the St. Louis Cardinals to seven games after defeating the Milwaukee Brewers 8-4 in a game where the Cuban Missile Aroldis Chapman came in relief.

• The Chicago Cubs have found their heir apparent to Lou Piniella. Sources tell BtBS that Isiah Thomas has been in contact with the organization about the managerial position. Thomas, who is under contract with the Florida International basketball program, told Behind the Box Score that, “If I can get this job, I will finally be able to complete my masterplan. Operation Knick Destruction.” Not sure how he will be able to accomplish that but this is coming from a man who believed Eddy Curry was the savior for New York basketball.

• Omaha Nighthawks RB Maurice Clarett practiced with his new team today in front of a crowd of seven. Clarett, who served three and a half years in prison in Toledo is excited for his new start. “It’s a blessing. Instead of facing Big Bubba on every down, I’ll face guys with less intention.” Clarett is slated as the no. 2 back behind Ahman Green who is returning from hip replacement surgery.

Even a month after he admitted to taking Andro from 1998 to 2004, he still is taking some drugs on the days he pitches, and some on off days. According to a USA Today report, he said that, “I have a lot of guys in the locker room who think I’m out of my mind because I’m taking a lot of things not on the approved list. I take 10 to 12 different things a day, and on the days I pitch, there’s four more things. There’s a caffeine drink I take from a company that Curt Schilling introduced me to in ’05. I take some Korean ginseng and a few other proteins out there that are not certified. But I haven’t failed any tests, so I figured I’m good.”

*Warning, Comedy Corner/Rant Upcoming*

I mean really? You take some type of PEDs before every time you pitch? The numbers don’t really show that. You are 10-11, and 10 of your 23 starts you have given up 5 ER or more. Not to mention the games you must have lost your pills and forgot where you left them at your house, when you got rocked for 9 ER, twice, only one time you had somehow made it through five innings. Could you somehow have not gotten those drugs across the Canada-US border when you got crushed for 10 ER in ONE INNING? I thought taking still illegal PEDs would help you get more speed on that fastball, or more turn on the curveball. But I guess the ball just flies 600 feet out of the yard no matter if you do take your drugs or not.

Oh, I’ll leave you with a nice quote all you Manny lovers. “I can see where guys like Hank Aaron and some of the old-timers have a beef with it. But as far as looking at Manny Ramirez like he’s serial killer Ted Bundy, you’re out of your mind. At the end of the day, you think anybody really cares whether Manny Ramirez’s kidneys fail and he dies at 50?

A week after David Ortiz’s positive test in 2003 was released, Ortiz decided to speak on the issue. Expected to give a testimony similar to Alex Rodriguez, Ortiz told the public, he has “no idea how I tested positive, I have never taken steroids.” Denial is a common theme with many steroid users and we will never know who is telling the truth.

 For many users, you can believe both ways whether they juiced or not, due to the stats they put up before the news of their positive test. Barry Bonds, yeah he took steroids but he was still hitting home runs before he allegedly using. Manny Ramirez, yes he was also hitting home runs before 2003.

David Ortiz, who? Did anyone know “Big Papi,” prior to ’03? With a lack of power and a weight issue, the Minnesota Twins released the newfound slugger after the 2002 season. In six seasons with Minnesota, Ortiz hit 50 home runs, yes throughout his entire tenure. That’s an average of 8.33 per season, and in 2003 during the first half, Ortiz had only four home runs. After the break was the turning point, in less than 100 games, Big Papi pounded out 27 jacks to end the year on 31.

Interesting right? How can you go from hitting 8 a season to 27 in one half? How can that be when Ortiz tested positive the year he had his “breakout” season? With numerous media outlets backing the Boston star, someone had to step up and bring some evidence to the table. At the age of 33, Ortiz has hit 246 home runs with Boston, four times the amount he averaged in Minnesota. During his hot streak, Ortiz was in his prime but a jump similar to his is just beyond belief. An unnamed scientist may have said his theory is “possible” but with the evidence shown, we all know what was going on.

 Two years removed from the Spygate scandal, another Boston sports team is corrupt and it’s about time somebody told the truth. Ortiz juiced and everybody knows it, but the mythical “Red Sox Nation,” refuses to believe it when the evidence is there, just give up the 2004 ring and quite possibly the ’07 ring, for most teams in Major League Baseball do it the right way, Boston in an 86 year drought decided to turn to steroids and the truth is coming out. Ortiz was roided so was Manny and it remains to be seen what will come from a trio of teams in Boston that hit more home runs than ever and won games because it.

In addition to Zach’s post earlier about the Red Sox possibly being tainted, another person thinks his name may show up on the list. Bronson Arroyo, who said that he would “not be surprised” if his name showed up on the list of the 104 MLB players that tested positive in 2003. Two other names, David Ortiz, and Manny Ramirez were released yesterday. “But guys like David and Manny, if they did something, it didn’t make them who they were. Did it make them a little better? Probably.” Bronson said. Also, he would not share any other information, that anything that happened wouldn’t go past the clubhouse doors.

Arroyo said he got his start in taking PED’s after being with the Pirates in 1998, in which he took androstenedione, banned in 2004. “Andro made me feel great, I felt like a monster. I felt like I could jump and hit my head on the basketball rim.” He gave up Andro after the banning. “Before 2004, none of us paid any attention to anything we took. Now they don’t want us to take anything unless it’s approved. But back then, who knows what was in stuff? The FDA wasn’t regulating stuff, not unless it was killing people or people were dying from it.”